on the way home from the newsagent after buying the SMH for My Career
Are those in receipt of government welfare payments forever destined to spend their lives in the solitary queues of centrelink offices? Maybe it is because society view the unemployed bum as the scum of society?
I'm starting to sound like Carrie from Sex in the City with all the deep and meaningful rhetoricals. This only serves as evidence to the fact that I'm seriously missing the wit, banter and sass of four single women in New York City - rather, I'm missing the wit, banter and sass of everyday life because for the past couple of days, I've spent it mostly at Centrelink and related agencies.
On Tuesday, at ten in the morning, Centrelink
forced requested me to attended a meeting with a Job Network member down in the shit hole that is Fairfield. Firstly, as I walked in, the receptionist started to talk to me in Vietnamese!
"Sorry?" I say, but why do I have to apologies to the stupid women who draws stereotypes from the local community. Obviously she's oblivious to any sense of style because I happened to be wearing all new clothes I purchased in the prior day's shopping expedition.
Anyway, five minutes later, another lady walks into the lobby and calls out my name with a heavy Asian accent and a red nose with mucus dripping down to the tip of her lips. Immediately, I jumped up and seriously wanted to scream "CHICKEN FLU" but given that this was a mandatory meeting (as my payments can be reduced if I "breach"), I reluctantly walked into a booth.
But that was the good bit - she then proceed to explain to me what a resume is and its various function. At this point, my face become expressionless with my mouth opened in silent horror! But wait for it, she then asks if I have a resume, to which I reply "Yes," but she then continues to ask me questions which I thought were for the database, but instead, they were for a resume she was creating for me! I told her I already had one, but she said "I'm making a standard one." The nerve! Implying I'm not standard, I'm beyond standard girl! Anyway, I felt quite offended at her incredulous manner towards me. So she proceed with the resume and the final result left me feeling dirty about myself (because it had my name on it). It was a white sheet of paper with writing on it with no regard for layout, presentation and above of, style and flair! Tragic waste of time, considering that I parked in a carpark that charged by the hour.
Later in the day, I had another appointment with Centrelink, this time, it was a presentation about Newstart allowance and the things related to it. It wasn't that bad, especially considering that I managed to go home, shower and change into new clothes (and by new, I mean new). But the real surprise occurred when the presenter actually new a number of the people in the presentation by name and faces! They must be regulars - how most embarrassing.
Are national holidays another excuse for those with partners and families to flaunt their happiness and enviable lives in public to the lonely and desperate out on the holiday hunt?
Australia day, or according to John Howard, Invasion day as its supposedly referred to in public schools (which I can attest to being correct in some of my high school teachers) was quite a good day. I went with family to the city and enjoyed a relaxed and cool lunch at Starcity where we managed to get 15 free drinks and half priced noodles and fish'n'chips because we were members. But the real highlight came when I saw and heard Lee-lin Chin speak in the flesh. Naturally, this occurred when I was shopping, in the
too cool for Sydney suburb of Paddington. She was walking towards me talking to her associate when I looked up, smiled and walked on, only realising a minute later it was her because she wasn't wearing her kooky glasses!
Perhaps it's not a matter of what's wrong with her, but rather, what's wrong with me that is affecting my life? But I'm perfect, so it's a case of what's wrong with her!
Alas, as with any good Sex in the City episode, the protagonist manages to solve their life problems by deflecting the blame and cause onto others. Here's to the final season of Sex in the City and may it be memorable and hopefully teach us some valuable life lessons in fashion!
btw, i forgot to mention that the plants in the centrelink office are
real! I know because I ripped off a leaf and took a bite of it and tasted bitter - confirming my ignorance of all things natural but not edible
tyarrhea looking forward to spending the week out of the Centrelink office
on the computer looking for employment
I've spent the past few weeks being unemployed - so naturally, I went shopping. Window shopping that is; which has, how should I say, invigorated me immensely, so much in fact, that I was compelled to compile a new wishlist. This will serve as the driver for me to succeed in what ever I do. So, as Britney Spears once famously sung, "
Opps, I did it again!"
On another note, chinese new year was a most depressing event - lucky pocket wise. With the demise of my later grandfather, lucky money is small this year. But it doesn't matter! Why? Because I have descended into the realm of what economists call the workforce, and I'm in that big subsection labelled unemployed. Yes,
I'm on welfare and am loving it! But it wasn't easy...I had to tell the interviewer off in Centrelink because they made a mistake which meant that I wasn't eligible for back payment. Being the annoying and loudmouth bastard I am, I prompty stopped talking to this interviewer and requested to speak to the person in charge. Noting that I wasn't going to keep quiet, a government worker did the unthinkable and broke the law so I could get back payment by back dating and validating forms which weren't sent to me. So now, I get $385 a fortnight and in return, in what they dub
mutual obligation I am required to seek 10 potential employers every fortnight and seek I am because at www.seek.com.au, there's thousands of potential jobs!
On another note, I recently discovered that the pot plants you see in office buildings and lobbys are not of the Anna Nicole Smith variety - that is, they're not fake! I didn't know this and I blame it on my ignorance of all things natural which are not edible. So next time I'm in centrelink, which will be every fortnight, I will attempt confirm that most shocking discovery.
So what does being unemployed have installed for me? Well, next week, I'm required to go to an Job Network member agency to have someone help me create my
resume. *sigh* its going to be a dull day on tuesday and later on in the arvo, I'm required to go to centrelink (again) to view a video telling me how to find a job - I can't believe australians are this thick headed! Anyway, i'll let everyone know the outcome and just so everyone knows, Gucci is on sale until the 29th!
anyway, take a look at my goals and let me know what you think of them. They are still preliminary and are subject to change.
tyarrhea filling in his jobseeker diary with frivilous positions such as "quantitaive funds analyst" and "business development officer"
on the way home from purchasing the SMH from the local newsagent
I apologise for the infrequentness of this blog because as of today and my untimely ascent into Sydney, I've been depressed, thoroughly depressed. Now is my summer of discontent, which stems from various facets of my life, which I will endow on you as a
cheaper means of therapy.
Firstly, "I don't want to wait for our lives to be over!" For those with an ounce of urban culture, you'll notice that the quote is the opening line of the chorus to the theme song for Dawson's Creek. Yes, Dawson's creek is over, after years of watching with a dictionary in hand we can finally say goodbye and good ridanance at the drawn out and superviously love triangle between Joey, Pacey and Dawson and for those who missed it, Pacey bagged Joey! You'd probably noticed that I've used a variety of words that is not common in everyday venacular - I call this Dawson Creek sydronme, where the suffer is convulsed to use superlative synomyns in place of easier and I dare say, colloquial language.
But why is Dawon's creek demise a source of discontent - simply because I have been watching it everyday because I am unemployed. Yes, I'm still unemployed and the greater shock to me is that the government has decided that I'm no longer a full time student and promptly usurped me of my right to claim welfare payments. As of today, I've had no income for this year and my total income stands at a handsomely amount of $220.52. Including the potential expenditure available on my credit card, my total sources of funds tallys to $370.87. I don't think that in my whole adult plus adolescent life I've ever been this poor; and it scares me! On thursday, I ventured unwilling into Parramatta westfields and baulk at the fact that this is NSW biggest shoppping centre. But the real shocker came when the shops were actually having a
real sale. By this, I mean that prices have been reduced sufficiently to satisfy the cheap and cheerful criterion, but given my
lack of financial strength, I resisted the temption of supervilous purchases, for which now i'm suffering severe withdrawal symptons my one of my sources of enjoyment: shopping, which is only opens until 9 on thursday night, pathetic opening times if you ask me!
As I mentioned briefly, my lack of funds is another reason that I've had to endure the endless and mundane that is summer television. Cricket, tennis, BW movies and B-grade sitcoms have taken their toll on me. Even DVD rentals are out of my league now. Yesterday I had to put back Legally Blonde 2 because I didn't have enough cash to pay for the rental, which incidently went up one buck and they didn't (!) accept credit cards, which is outrageous. To quote another famous blonde, "I'm financially poor but luxury rich"
Carrie Bradshaw
On the otherside of the coin, or rather, the otherside of the world, the continual strength, or rather, the bravado of the RBA's interest rate policy and George W Bush incompetence has resulted in an even stronger AUD/USD exchange rate. The consequence is that my aussie dollars can now buy more overseas, but alas, I'm in australia. The very thought of cheaper foreign goods only causes more groans of pain which futher ingrains my discontent.
But not all is barren and empty. There are things to look forward to. Chinese new year is coming up and that is another, albeit, temporary source of income! Yay! But don't think I'm a greedy little asian bugger because I work my arse off before chinese new year. Previous years have seem me slave away in the kitchen preparing food; cutting, chopping, slicing, dicing, shredding, grating - you name it, i've done it. And only to wake up the next morning at the crack of dawn to start the cooking of the food which all must be completed and presented before noon all before a bunch of extended family who only helps in setting the table while i'm licking my wounds from the spit of hot oil. But not this year, with the death of my grandfather, i suspect that there won't be as many family members over which will mean less food to prepare. *sigh* my grandfather always gave a big red pocket...
Chinese new year will also see my at first interview of the year. At 8:30 in the morning, I will be at centrelink, being interviewed for Newstart allowance. Yes, I will be back on welfare and am looking forward to it. But don't think its that easy. Firstly, I'm going to tell stupid Centrelink off for cutting my only source of income and forcing me to live frugally for the past 3 weeks. They are going to get an earful and hopefully, a formal complaint and request for back payments!
tyarrhea to conflicted to check for grammatical errors
on the way home from dinner
Well, thirty five days have past and tonight is my final night in the asian city of lights - yes, i will be leaving hong kong tomorrow and returning to australia; in 2 days though because i'll be taking a night flight.
anyway, i'm seriously going to miss this place. i will post more on my retrospect once i return to sydney. Now, i'm going to pack and audit my purchases to ensure that there will be enough room for last minute purchases tomorrow morning.
take care and goodbye hong kong
on the way home after NYE celebrations
Happy new year. I hope everyone celebrated the coming of 2004 among the company of family and friends, because I didn't - in fact, my NYE was quite dismal for a number of reasons. Firstly, I fought my way through the throngs of people who gather in Tsim Sha Tsui after my relatives
abandoned me went home. I finally reached Kowloon Pier on Victoria Harbour which just happened to be a clear night - unusual for Hong Kong because there is always a thick blanket of fog/smog/pollution hanging in the air. Anyway, I was by myself on the pier surrounded by one of the best night time scenery in the world and no one to share it with...except for one person,
Snowjay. Although I don't know him very well, the thought of spending NYE with a local was very appealing. However, my feeble attempts of contacting him were thwarted by my stupidity for failing to recharge the mobile phone and the dense concentration of mobile phones in the vicinity rendering my only means of communication inoperable. Alas, I was all by myself. This made me feel quite upset and depressed because everyone else around had at least one person to talk to - even the cleaners had fellow cleaners to converse with.
So I sat there, alone and cold by the waterfront waiting for an eventful countdown. But did it happen? Yes it did, but not what I had expected. The countdown was performed in Canto *obviously* which I couldn't follow until the timer hit 20 where my attempts at instilling english to those around me where drowned out by the roar of the crowd. So I counted down in Canto too. Another sad highlight.
But the real fizzle was the lack of fizzle - there were no fireworks, no big bang, no bright lights, no giant orgy - just a bunch of Asians yelling and jumping up and down. The lack of alcohol also ensured that no free entertainment in the form of fights and tantrums occurred. A
real disappointment. Even the real wacky and weird
revolting, utterly disgusting fashion of honkie girls failed to cite some snide remarks from me (for those who know me, complaining
is entertainment for me).
So my NYE was quite a downer. But I had one highlight which lifted my severely depressed spirits. On the way back from the waterfront, we were ushered by the police to follow a stupid procession out of the area which happened to bypass the Peninsula and its arcade. For those who don't know and from those who do, the Peninsula is one of the best hotels in the world and the best in Hong Kong. Anyway, the ground floor of the Peninsula is graced by the likes of Louis Vuitton, Prada, Versace, Tiffany and Co, Celine, Manolo Blanik (???), Boss, Gucci, Cartier, Ferragamo and more (many more) and as I strolled along these procession of boutiques, I started to smile - a first for the night. Why? Because I was content in knowing that one day, I will be able to shop at the Peninsula Arcade (I've already shopped there but left empty handed).
So I formed my new years resolution - to shop at the Peninsula. This will entail returning to Hong Kong and significantly raising the credit limit on my Mastercard.
So my lack of companionship for NYE was made up for by...what else - dreams. Who ever said money doesn't buy happiness has never shopped at the Peninsula.
Anyway, I
really do hope everyone enjoyed the start of 2004 and my dismal NYE only strengthens my resolve to have a better start to '05.
tyarrhea now looking for a psychiatrist to address his addiction to frivilous expenditure
p.s. check out WS website for some pics. You can get there by clicking
here.
