On the way out of the hottest restaurant in townHave you ever been in a position where you notice someone and you instantly recognise they have a certain aura about them. Perhaps it’s the way the dress, how they carry themselves or maybe because they are simply stunning.
Often, these epiphanies lead to copycat fakes and wannables. One only needs to look down at the realm of faux designer goods to understand. Nevertheless, the imitation is often the sincerest form of flattery. To imitate someone is to recognise that someone has a unique and special quality about them that you wish you had.
I had an epiphany the other night. After dinner at one of the hottest places in town, we walked out into the cold wet night and there it was: my epiphany: a titanium Bentley Continental GT Spur parked in front of the restaurant.
Not wanting to be a commoner and simply parallel park beside the curb, the Bentley simply stopped in the middle road and there it was, while’s its owner was inside in the restaurant unperturbed that their half million status symbol was creating all sorts of traffic problems.
So there I was. Standing in the middle of the road in the drizzling rain unshakable from my epiphany. But of course my Bentley will be ebony black.
On the way to recover my breathEver so often, you get this primal urge where you just want to let go all of inhibitions and do it, right there and then. All notions of sense and sensibility go out the window in your attempts of scratching that unreachable itch. Where another thought of the deed is enough to render you manic. It is the most basic of human instincts and something we hide but cannot deny.
For me, I relieve myself at this underground place located in Bond Street in the city. It is a secret perversion I hide from fellow humans by saying something incognito such as “Oh, I’m just having a long lunch” or “Yeah, I’m working late again” but secretly, I am at this dungeon where I don’t feel constrained and I can relieve the stress and just let it all hang out.
It is shameful process I endure to scratch that itch. It involves undressing from my suit and tie and emerging in costume for an hour or sometimes, if I have the energy, two hours of pure endophytic climax.
Lately however, I have it harder and harder to leave this underground place. Every time I leave the gym, I am confronted by the endless of sight of expensive modelled Mercedes Benz, BMWs and Jaguars, the status symbol of the corporate elite. By the time I make back on the middle classed George Street, I am feeling severely depressed, detached and demoted; the endorphin high lasting until the first sight of the big shiny black car.
But recently, something strange has occurred on Bond. It is that time of the year where the after Christmas and the New Year period where things are quiet before Easter except for a select few who are receiving news of their, dare I say, mountainous bonuses; earmarked by the fact that the other day, after work, I saw in procession on Bond Street, a shiny red Maranello Ferrari and right behind it a glistering grey Aston Martin Vantage and if I was not suicidally depressed at that point, behind the Aston Martin was a deep topaz Bentley Continental GT.
I considered jumping in front of a train that afternoon but then realised I still had another month left on my train ticket.
On the way to buy a cake to lift my moodI have come to realise that my world is one that is filled with loneliness, depression and disorientation. Since the new year, I haven’t had a prolong moment of care free happiness. It is a hard world.
Sitting alone the other day, I think I’ve worked out the cause of my discontent – a lack of spiritual grounding, guidance and grouping. And the next day at work, something miraculous happened. I stumbled across and article of upmost spiritual truth and inspiration. I have since copied those verses and pasted them on my walls to remind me each and every day that there is light, hope and happiness in the most disparaged situations.
I feel a sense of obligation to share them.
“Money isn’t everything, but it so much easier to cry in the back of a Rolls Royce”
“The idea that money can not buy happiness is spread by the rich so the poor won’t envy them”
“I would rather by unhappy in a sprawling mansion by the harbour than ecstatic in a fibro house”
“Money may not buy happiness, but it buys everything else”
And with that, I am going to start a greeting card company.
